Category Archives: Thoughts

I am such a horrible blogger, Benedict Cumberbatch kinda terrifies me, and other revelations since my last post

OK I AM SO SORRY FOR NOT BLOGGING FOR ALMOST 100 DAYS!!!! But things have been chaotic because….

  1. MY SHERLOCK HOLMES PAPER GOT ACCEPTED INTO A CONFERENCE!!!!
  2. Second semester. End of story.
  3. I may or may not have forgotten my password to this account. Whoops. Not one of my shining moments…

But let’s talk about probably the coolest thing that has happened in my short life: I’m officially presenting at my first academic conference! My paper on Sherlock Holmes fan works (which I have been documenting my progress on since I started classes last semester) was one of the first papers accepted (or at least I think it was since I’m basing everything off of confirmation numbers).  I am so pumped for this experience! But, with that being said, my school denied my request for funding and everything for the trip (my flight, hotel, etc.) is coming out of pocket.  I’ve started a GoFundMe, so if you could share the link or possibly donate a couple of dollars towards my campaign, that would be lovely. Thank you ❤

So kinda going off of that…

My family came down to visit me at school for the Easter weekend (which was wonderful), and my brother asked me what I would do if Benedict Cumberbatch came to my presentation and wanted to talk to me about it afterwards.  I told him that I would be terrified.

“Psh. Yeah right. Terrified of meeting one of your favorite actors who you not only find attractive, but a fascinating person who you would kill for an opportunity to sit down and have a conversation with? I don’t believe it.”

But here’s the thing: I’m not terrified of meeting him.

I’m terrified of letting him down.  Or anyone, for that matter.

I have put so much work into this paper so far (and after the semester is over, I’m going to be putting a lot more in as well), that I have a lot of people rooting for me.  I’m fortunate for this support, but I don’t want to let them down.  Failure has always been one of my biggest fears, and I don’t want it to let it get the best of me.  Out of anyone I could be presenting this to, Benedict (as well as anyone involved with the show, for that matter) knows the source material as well as I do.  For me, that’s intimidating because he knows a lot of what I’m basing my argument off of.  I don’t want this to fall short of expectations.

I shouldn’t really be fretting about this, but I’ve tried to get other cast/production crew members to retweet my GoFundMe link so I can hopefully raise the money to go on the trip.  If they’ve seen the link, they know when and where the presentation is and what I’m arguing. Which means that there is that slim chance that they’ll be there.

 

But that’s not going to happen, right?

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A Few of My Favorite Things Pt. 4: Not My Words

Happy beginning of December!  Wow, it’s weird thinking I started college only 4 months ago… Where has the time gone? I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with lots of family and great food!  I know I loved seeing everyone back home, even if it was just for a few days.

So, to continue with the series (which I hope everyone’s enjoying), I thought I’d share some of my favorite quotes.

For When I’m at a Road Block: 

“When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.”~Sherlock Holmes (The Sign of the Four).

For me, this kinda demonstrates that nothing is truly impossible.  There’s always a small chance that anything can happen, and, sometimes, you just have to hold on to that glimmer of hope.

When I Need Reminded Why I Want To Go To Medical School:

“You ‘never interfere in the affairs of other peoples or planets’ unless there’s children crying”~Amelia Pond (Doctor Who, The Beast Below)

This was actually the basis for my one college application essay.  I’ve wanted to go into medicine since I was 4 (yes, really.  I’ve known since that early of an age that I’ve wanted to be a doctor. I have photos to prove it, too), and I’ve always loved working with kids.  Since I primarily want to work with Type 1 Diabetics (who are typically diagnosed as children), I’ve said that, basically, I want to answer their cries.

When Life Just Seems Hard:

“Don’t Dream It. Be It”~Rocky Horror Picture Show

Sometimes I just need that little bit of a push in order to remember that I can be whatever I want to be.  Nothing’s Impossible.  You just have to work for it.

When You Need To Smile:

“Roses are Red

Violets are Blue

Rhyming is hard

I’m Batman”~Unknown

I don’t think I need to say anything else.  Have, a good week, everyone! I’ll leave you all with this gem. Image

I Have Guy Issues. But That’s Not New.

So this is another one of my “I’m going to rant about my insecurities and lack of guts” posts. So feel free to keep scrolling past. I won’t be offended.

This Saturday, we’re having a Gatsby-themed dance on campus. Guess who has two thumbs and doesn’t have a date? THIS GIRL! *points at self* That puts the total at 5 dances that I haven’t had a date to, plus countless other events I haven’t gone with a guy to.

It’s not like I don’t TRY to get to know the guys I find myself falling for. Like the song says, “Breaking my back just to know your name.” I attempt to start conversations with them, whether it be in person (when I actually see them) or on Facebook (when you can’t talk to them in person, like what happened with me this summer. I’ll vent about this story then). But, just my luck, I never see the guy(s) I like (so I can’t talk face to face) and, if I try to talk to them over the internet, they rarely respond! It’s aggravating!

Want proof of my luck? Take the guy I fell for at orientation: I met him at the first event. He was literally the first guy I met (I had already met a couple of girls). We were in the same small group, and, just because I knew nobody, I sat down next to him. We chatted about the stereotypical small-talk topics, and, when the actual thing started, they had us stand up. First words out of my mouth: “HOLY CRAP YOU’RE TALL!” He was over 6′ tall, and I was just there, me and all of my 5′ 5″ shortness. So, we got to know each other over the next 3 days, and I found out that we liked a lot of the same things (he was into musicals and a lot of the same bands as me, even some of the ones nobody at home had ever heard of). When we left for the summer, we friended each other on Facebook and I started talking to him the one night online (since we weren’t going to be seeing each other again until move-in at the end of August). We had a really good conversation, and I thought “Hey, I might be able to keep chatting and hang out with him once we’re both in school.” Well, that idea kinda died after that conversation. I messaged him a couple days later when it appeared he was on, and no response. Tried again a couple weeks later: nothing. Tried once again closer to move-in: A response filled with a whole lot of NOTHING. Then, we moved in, and I figured “Hey. We’re in the same dorm building, I’ll be bound to see him and chat with him!”

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no. Between the end of August and about mid-October, I could have probably counted the days I had seen him on one hand. And it gets better! One time, I was getting over a stomach bug, so I looked like death walking. A couple of the times, I just looked unattractive from coming straight home from my self-defense class. I just have not been able to talk to him in a normal context since orientation.

This is how I feel like it’s been for EVERY guy I have ever liked. Meet them. Fall for them. Get to know them. Try to talk to them. Never hear from them. Feel alone.

Sigh. Sorry for unloading this all on y’all. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like I keep going through the same hoops, and I never get anywhere. I’m also starting to kinda fall for another guy, and I really don’t want to keep this trend up. If anyone out there has any advice, I would love to hear it!

Thanks, everyone.

Mid-Semester Update #1: At Least I Know Where I’m Going… Kind Of…

Happy Almost-Halloween!  I figured that, since midterms are wrapping up for everyone here, I would share some things that I have learned from my first 2 months of college!

1. MapQuest and iMaps can, and will be, your best friends the first couple of weeks.  

Ok this seems kinda simple.  But, if you are like me and get lost walking in a straight line are directionally challenged, then the walking directions from MapQuest or whatever map site you use will be your saving grace when navigating around a big campus for the first time.  Plus, you can send MapQuest directions to your phone and save a tree or 2!

2. Don’t be afraid to try new things!

This has probably been said on every college tour/presentation/anything, but it’s true!  You never know what you’ll end up liking.  For instance, I thought it would be a smart idea to take a self-defense course since I’m living in a big city, and I would prefer not to get attacked by some creep.  I have never been athletic or violent, so I thought that I might end up hating it since I would feel stupid.  Right now, it’s one of my favorite classes and I have met 2 of my good friends through it.  College is all about finding who you are, so don’t be afraid to try something you wouldn’t have touched with a 10-foot pole before!

3. Open dorm doors will attract people.  But that’s ok. You’ll most likely become best friends with them.

This might have only happened to me, but, by opening my door, I actually met the people who live across the hall and down the hall from me.  It’s cool because, if one of us has the door to our living area open (our dorms are kinda like mini-apartments for 4 people.  It’s quite nice), we’ll yell stuff at each other when we’re entering or leaving our own rooms.  We’ve gone and ended up doing our homework or folded our laundry that we just pulled out of the dryer in each others’ rooms.  It’s so much fun, and it’s one of my favorite things about my dorm building 🙂

4. Don’t be ashamed of what you’re interested in.  You’re almost guaranteed to find someone who likes the same things.

Where I grew up, everyone was kind of interested in the same types of things (Justin Bieber, mainstream pop culture, tv sitcoms, etc.). There’s nothing wrong with that, but I just wasn’t that into those types of things.  I love British television (Sherlock and Doctor Who), love rock music (I’m listening to My Chemical Romance at the moment), and anything geeky (Bill Nye is my hero).  When I came to college, I had no idea how easy it would be to find people who like the same things as me.  As it turned out, my super-awesome RA is a huge geek (we constantly talk about Supernatural, even though she’s 2+ seasons ahead of me at the moment), one member of my quiz team likes Doctor Who, and my entire writing class is a member of one fandom or another.  People who dig what you dig do exist, you just have to find them.

5. Do what you love, and love what you do. Just make sure you can find a job.

Fun fact: you do actually have to pay back your college loans! Shocker, right?!  The truth is, you can go to school, and you can get a 4.0 and be super involved and have a kick-butt resume, but if you major in something like “Early Classical Interpretive Dance” (which I just made off the top of the head.  If people actually study this, I want to meet them) where there is literally no job market, it’s all pointless.  I’m not recommending majoring in, say, Chemistry, when you hate science with a burning passion and would much rather play the trumpet. But make sure that, while you’re investing your (or your parent’s) money into 4 years of education, make sure that it’s something that you can make money off of eventually.  I’m fortunate that Biology and Medicine are both my passion and a booming job market, but I’m also passionate about music.  I’m not majoring in it, but I’m still playing the sax and doing what I love.

Thanks for reading!  Feel free to comment/drop me a question/send me a picture of your lunch/ whatever! I’d love to hear from the people who hear my ramblings!

A Little Bit of Hope

Sorry for the lack of posts recently.  College has been, well, college.  Homework, projects, and all sorts of fun stuff like that have officially taken over my life.  But I have some time before my next class, so I figured I’d write a quick post 🙂

Disclaimer: This is going to be a giant fan girl moment.  If you don’t care about my fangirl-ness, then don’t read.  I won’t be offended.

Remember how I posted about sending surveys to celebrities involved with adaptations of Sherlock Holmes? Well, thanks to the magic of Tumblr and Twitter, I saw that someone who sent Andrew Scott (Moriarty on the BBC series) a somewhat similar survey got a response from him! She said that it took her between a month and 2 months to hear a response.  Since today is the 2-week anniversary of me putting the letters in the mail, I hopefully may have a completed survey by the time I actually have to submit the final paper for a grade! Also, if Andrew is known to do these things, who’s to say that the other people I sent surveys to won’t?!

He also sent the girl an autograph, which, if I got one, would be my first non-musician autograph!  (I have things signed by “Weird Al”, Fitz and the Tantrums, A Great Big World, and 2Cellos, and from parts of the Broadway casts of Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark and American Idiot, but nothing from any TV/Film actors).

So here’s hoping that maybe, just maybe, I will be able to throw in some first-hand quotes from the big names 😀

Nerves of Anything But Steel

Remember how I talked about those surveys I was sending out for my Sherlock Holmes project? Well, they’re in the mail now.  I know I really shouldn’t be, but I’m nervous about them.  I love how they turned out, and I’m proud to say that I did this, but that doesn’t help.  I think it’s the fact that I can’t personally go and hand everyone a copy and say “hi I’m a student working on this project, and I would love it if you could fill this out for me” and then see if they’re interested.

Well, I could do that, but I’d go broke from the plane tickets, hotels, bail payments for alleged stalking, etc.

I think the part that bothers me the most is that everything’s out of my control.

I’m not a control freak or anything, but I like to know what’s going on.

I can’t even guarantee that over half of the people I sent surveys to will be able to send back the surveys, since apparently Americans can’t pre-pay for postage for something to be sent back from London (I included self-addressed envelopes with everything and, at least for the USA-bound ones, I pre-paid for return postage)! Gotta love living in America, where we currently have no government! But, that’s a rant for another day and another blog post…

So.  Now the waiting game begins.  Fingers crossed that I hear something and add that little bit of special-ness (is that a word?) to my paper.

3 Things I Wish I Had The Guts To Do

Well, I’m 2 weeks into college and, so far, I haven’t done anything too horribly stupid.  So that’s an accomplishment.

A little fun fact about myself: I tend to think of a lot of things when it’s about 11:30 at night and I’m attempting to fall asleep.  Don’t ask me why this happens, but it gets annoying (especially when you have an 8:30 class the next morning).  But, last night, I was thinking about fear, and the things I wish I had the courage to do.  I came up with 3 really good things I’d like to do, but am to scared to do.

1. Skydive

I’m pretty sure that, if everyone made a list like this, skydiving would be one of the most common things on there.  I’ve always wondered what it would be like to feel weightless, but I’ve never had an opportunity to learn. It probably doesn’t help that I have a semi-fear of heights….

2. Ask Out The Guy I’m Crushing On

Yeah, yeah yeah… typical teen girl issue, right here!  But, for as long as I can remember, I haven’t been able to form a logical conversation when alone with a guy I like, let alone ask him out on a date.

3. Go To A Party Where There Might Be Alcohol

This sounds like such a ridiculous thing to be afraid of, but just hear me out!  Ever since I was 4, I’ve wanted to go medical school.  In order to get into a really good medical school, you have to be a good kid.  Being a good kid means not getting arrested for drugs, alcohol, illegal activity, pure stupidity, etc.  Since I’m not 21, I will get arrested if I get caught with alcohol.   Which is bad.  I know I could go to a party and not drink and be completely sober and have fun.  I just have a fear that I would be the one good kid who would get in trouble for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Sorry for basically the vent session.   But ’tis life.

Anyone out there have any other interesting fears?

“Just know you’…

“Just know you’re not alone
I’m going to make this place your home”
~Home by Phillip Phillips

As I close my first official week of being a college student (I moved in early), this lyric really sticks out to me.  This is really the first time I’ve really been out on my own, without anyone telling me what to do, who to hang out with, where to go and when.  I didn’t know if I would find people like me, who were here to learn instead of party and who shared my love of Doctor Who, Sherlock, The Avengers and all things nerdy.  But I did.

I felt at home.

Every hesitation I had before coming here, whether it be about classes, housing, and just if this was right for me in general, is gone, and I have no regrets up to this day.

I love my home 🙂

New Beginnings

Wow.  Apologies for not updating in over 2 months.  Life happened.  But that is then.  This is NOW!

 

So a quick update: I’m now at college, getting ready to start another school year filled with learning, knowledge, and other college-ish things!

I think the part I love most about college is that you have the chance to become the person you want to be.  You don’t have your parents trying to raise you to their standards. Instead, you have the chance to make your own decisions.  You want to go party all Sunday night, even though you have an 8 o’clock class the next day? Nobody’s stopping you.

But the freedom’s a double-edged sword.  For the first time in some people’s lives, they’re actually held responsible for their actions.  They don’t have mom and dad around to sort out the mess created by their mistakes.  Gone are the days of letters written to teachers explaining that there was “a misunderstanding” on a project’s due date.  For me, this isn’t a huge adjustment from how life was during high school.  I was held accountable for my homework, projects, and everything else, but I knew my parents were always available to help me figure out how to fix mistakes.   Being in college over 2 hours away from home, it’s different.  I have to learn how to be an adult and solve my own problems.  It’s a learning experience.

But I think I’m ready, though.  I’ve prepared to the best of my abilities, and I know that I don’t know everything.  I will make mistakes, and I will learn from them.  I know where I want to be down the road, and I know that, with hard work, I will be able to fulfill my dreams.

The only thing standing in my way is myself.

 

 

Until next time ❤

Oh Jeez….

Wow. Almost 200 views already…
I’M NOT THAT INTERESTING!
Seriously. The highlight of my day today is going to either be this coffee I’m drinking right now (a cafe chocolate!) or a Costco run tonight. No lie.
But thank you for making me feel important!

Since I don’t have any profound words of wisdom at 8 in the morning, I figured I’d address a question that has been bugging me recently.

Why do people care about the Kardashians?

Seriously, though. They’re celebrities for doing WHAT now? Being famous? That makes no sense to me. Now if they actually did something impressive and I just don’t know about it, let me know so I can take back what I said. But as far as I know, they have done little for society except show off. I much rather see celebrities use their fame and do good things with it. Like Tom Hiddleston. Famous? Yes. Huge supporter of UNICEF UK? Yes. Uses his celebrity to gain support for the organization? Yes.
Those are the people that inspire me, no matter how much I enjoy watching some people crash and burn (you know who I’m talking about).

Sorry for the rant. Let me know I anything I said is incorrect and I’ll revise my statement.

Thanks guys 🙂